For as far back as I can remember I knew I was adopted, and in my family, that made me pretty special. I knew I was wanted, loved, prayed for long before I was even born. I knew what adoption meant from an early age – that my birth mother was too young and did not have the means to take care of me, so she made the ultimate sacrifice to give me to a family that could take care of me and provide me with a loving, stable home.
Even though I always knew I was adopted, I never felt any less part of our family unit. If anything, I was extra loved…and maybe a little spoiled. Not only do I have two parents who prayed and sacrificed just to be my Mom and Dad, but I also have two pretty amazing older sisters who have had my back since the beginning. I know I had it quite a bit easier than my sisters. I was definitely given things they never had, was able to do things they weren’t, was granted a bit more leniency from Mom and Dad than they were. If anything, they could have easily been jealous or even resented me for it, but they only loved me more, gave me more and fought for me more.
In our family, we have a tradition, every year on our birthdays Mom tells us our birth stories. Of course, mine sounds a little different than my sister’s. I never had many questions about my adoption because Mom has always been pretty open about it, giving me most of the information she knew. Back in the early 80’s, closed adoptions were the standard, so we never kept in touch with my birth mother or family. When I turned 16 and Mom told me my birth story, she also shared that she understood that someday I might want to know more or even search for my birth family, and that she would support me and help me if that time ever came.
To me, I love my birth mother for what she did for me – she gave me to the family I was meant to be with. It was always a part of God’s plan. I have always been at peace with that and do not feel the need to go searching or find out more. I also love my Mom so much for what she did. She has loved me as her own since birth and never made me feel any less or different. She not only raised me my whole life as her own, but is willing to let me…HELP me find my birth mother if that were to be my choosing. These two women are the most selfless people I know.
Maybe someday we will all meet…maybe in Heaven. But today, during National Adoption Month, 1 week before I turn 30, I am at peace with where I am and who I am. I am blessed to have a family that have always made me feel comfortable with my story, so that I am able to share and be living proof of the positively beautiful side of adoption.